The Reality of Uni: The Facts!
From the moment I got my A-Level results I was repeatedly told by parents, aunts, uncles, distant cousins, friends, lovers, haters etc that University was when everything came full circle.
“University is the best time of your life”
“It is where you meet the friends that you will keep forever”
“You will never forget Uni!”
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but this is NOT true!
Yes of course for a few people (a very small amount) University is a new Era, a new beginning to start over. The truth is:
It is like Marmite: You either love it or you hate it.
Firstly most people move away from home. If you are dying to leave home because you cannot stand living with mum and dad then obviously that is a major bonus. However you think that moving away from home would give you a new found freedom…it does…it definitely does..but it is totally dependant on who you find yourself living with. It is not home, but it is living with people you do not know and probably will not like. All uni’s tend to mix and match different people together. I think it is only Cambridge and Oxford that try to be clever and put all the people studying the same subject together.
I found myself in the middle of the countryside in Kent. Far enough from home that I should live in halls. I got what was meant to be the luxury halls-en-suite bedrooms-this actually meant a separate shower room and toilet in each bedroom (luxury definitely as you do not want to share with others-but not worth the price you pay). The truth of en-suite is a shower that over fills with water and spills into your bedroom that you then have to dry with a hair dryer each morning in order to avoid the room stinking of mouldy water spills. Plus the chances of you ever having hot water is a complete gamble-make sure you know your neighbours because the amount of times I knocked on their door and asked if I could use their shower!
I was self catering and trust me no matter how much you get your mum to teach you dishes to cook or think that you can afford the groceries each month, it is never going to make a blind bit of difference. Famously people go to Uni and change physically, some balloon due to bingeing on everything after nights out and end up getting really overweight or you drink to much and don’t eat so you do the opposite and become very thin-Eating habits at Uni are AWFUL!! I lived off of pasta every night and then when I started to gain weight I quickly changed to eating tuna, kidney beans and salad dressing (tastes much nicer than you think). Suddenly I lost all the weight and started to get really skinny. There is no in-between no matter how good you think you are at cooking.
Automatic housemates-whether you are sharing a house with strangers the first year or in halls. The chances are you will make friends with the people around you for about two weeks before finding other people that suit you better. Most of the time this lands you in trouble as there is always someone who is upset that you have got other friends. I was apart of a girl group (six of us) who all lived down the same corridor and it was not until 2 months in that I realised just how much I hated them. They were horrible. This went from a fake friendship to bullying. I had only been at Uni for two terms and I was being locked in rooms and not let out for hours. They would constantly bang on my door in the early hours of the morning shouting insults at me. This resulted in me huddling under my desk crying. Unfortunately this is normal behaviour at Uni.
You are repeatedly told that the people in Uni are more mature and friendly, but this is a total lie. The people at Uni are the same immature brats that you wanted to leave behind at school. They are dominated by what and who is popular. If you are in America for University this is highlighted in the sororities and fraternities that you are never going to be included in. In London you have the “hot or not” lists. People do not change in the few months between school and Uni. Do yourself a favour and don’t convince yourself that they will be different.
DON’T go to Uni with a boyfriend…you may be the strongest couple in the world but you are going to have the worst time of your life at University if you have a boy on your arm. One of you will be swayed by other people and the other will be left shocked and devastated. You waste your time clutching hold of the past instead of allowing yourself to grow. If you break up with your high school sweet heart and then get back together after Uni-than it was meant to be. If not the chances are you will find your hubby at Uni or after.
A little hint…if you go to Uni single..the chances are that you will meet someone within the first month of being there-that is standard! Try not to get into a relationship til the second year otherwise your entire University experience becomes dominated by your new boyfriend and more often than not it ends and you are left with the worst memories.
The people you meet at Uni will change all the time. The friendship groups you are apart of in the first year will be entirely different to the people you ultimately end up being close to, and they do not all become your closest friends after Uni. Most of the people I was friends with, I do not hear from anymore. I only keep in touch with two girls who were my best friends in the last year.
You want to survive Uni?
- Keep your friends at home as close as possible. They are the ones that in three years time you are going to come back to!
- Don’t make your mind up about Uni until you get there: If you think it is going to be the best time of your life-it will be the worst and vice versa.
- Try and avoid going to Uni with a boyfriend.
- Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that the first people you meet/like are going to be your friends right through your experience-they won’t.
So the next time someone says to you:
“University is going to be the time of your life”
Just smile, nod and remember they are talking crap, but at least you are now armed with the facts and the real benefits that are going to make your Uni life a good time. MAKE THE MOST OF IT-because next step is non-stop work and that means very few holidays, very little money and a whole not of no-fun!! Yay!!
- Armageddon? Not quite (destinycalls2193.wordpress.com)
- 25 Tips For Starting Uni (knitteddaisy.wordpress.com)
- Writing, Stress and Escapism (misskzebra.wordpress.com)
- Oxford Brookes Uni (bitchesinbritain.wordpress.com)
- Dear teacher (makemesteaks.wordpress.com)
- Lucy Tobin: University is still worth all the agony of A-levels (standard.co.uk)
- PadUni- The WHO, WHAT and WHY (paduni.com)
- Girls crowd the campus as boys lose taste for uni (schoolsimprovement.net)
- Zurich uni worker posts body parts pics on web (thelocal.ch)
- Anthropology and the like (soundsofself.wordpress.com)