Work Christmas Party Curse.

Work Christmas Party Curse

If you are in full time work, you will either be incredibly lucky with your workplace spending a fortune on taking you abroad and basically giving you a holiday, or they will organise a really simple ‘drinks down the local pub’ with a nice little tab that allows you to get one drink and not feel bad about leaving at 11 to go home. 

If, on the other hand you work for a high profile company that is very much in the public eye then you will know that the Work Christmas Party is NEVER that simple. 

Exciting? YES but only because they spend a fortune on trying to out do the competition:

From personalised vodka luges to handmade cocktails drunk out of coconuts. 

From Burlesque dancers toppling down from the ceiling on top of bars to high profile singers and bands performing.

From high class business clients to Celebrity guests. 

You name it they do it.

There is no doubt their main aim is to impress, not to give the people who work there a treat.

(They think that they are doing both but actually the people who work for the company just want a bit of a break from the work place and free drink. What they get is an over the top night out where they are too frightened to drink alot just in case they do something that might get them fired.

Fired at a Work Christmas Party? But it is impossible? It is the one night out with work that you get away with murder?

NOT TRUE!!!! Especially in a billion dollar company! In fact it is the one night that gives the bosses a real excuse to get rid of the people they do not like. 

So let me tell you about my Work Christmas party last year (enough to have put me off this year!):

I work at the front of the building-the first thing you see, the last when you leave. Therefore a company with over 500 people in it all know who I am and what my name is (I do not know 500 peoples names and faces-l wish I was that good!) 

SO imagine how awkward it is turning up to a very expensive work party in a very exclusive bar with a lot of celebrity people walking around (and no they did not get paid to be there-they are actually work colleagues). Which means paparazzi are standing outside the front, and you have to pray to god that the “spanx inspired cheaper version granny panties” holding in your hip bulge are firmly in the right place-otherwise there are going to be some awful photos appearing next to Celebrities in the Daily Mail. 

As I got into the actual venue, I barely moved 5 steps from the door and I had already engaged in about 15 conversations all that went in the same way: ‘Hi, How are you?’ repeated about five times until you realise, both of you, that you actually know nothing about the person in front of you. 

By the time I had taken 15 steps into the venue my mouth was starting to ache from the fake smile plastered on my face.

Then the groping began.

At least five men tried to hit on me, touch me and one even tried to kiss me. 

Now I make very clear that I have a boyfriend, the only thing missing is the engagement ring on my finger, because I am not engaged however every opportunity I get I talk about him.

So why would you try it on with a girl that you know has a boyfriend? Because they do not care!

Now do not get me wrong I am loud and very obvious when pushing someone off. Polite but stern I say to all five of the guys “Get off” and with that I prance off to the next conversation. 

However when it gets to the sixth person trying something you feel like screaming. 

It got to 11pm and I was already heading towards the fire exit. 

What was meant to be a treat for people who work as a part of the company, was actually the worst event I have ever been to.

Did it stop there?

No of course not, I went into work the following morning to a lot of odd looks. I then found out that one of the guys that I had spurned, had been so annoyed, he decided to tell everyone in the building that it was actually me who had come on to him!!! I set him straight. 

Most annoying thing? I HAVE to go this year because it is actually in my job description-NO LIE! (Mantain appearances at work events and present the company to the best of your ability-I guess that screws my plan of getting absolutely hammered!)

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